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COULD WE GIVE THE EAST COAST FRANCHISE TO HARRY AND MEGHAN AS A WEDDING PRESENT?

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ARRIVING SHORTLY AT PLATFORM TWO- A HADDOCK AND A DOVER SOLE

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FOR THE PRICE OF HS2 WE COULD BRIDE OUR WAY TO HOSTING THE NEXT 10,000 WORLD...

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TRAVEL IN THE FRONT-FOUR COACHES. THERE WILL BE A 'CONSCIOUS UNCOUPLING'...

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LOOK! THERE'S THAT NICE COUPLE WE MET WAITING FOR A TRAIN AFTER CHRISTMAS

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THE 8.35 IS DELAYED BECAUSE THE WOMEN'S CARRIAGE KEPT THE REST OF THE TRAIN...

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I'M STANDING UP FOR THE RIGHTS OF PASSENGERS - BECAUSE THERE'S NOWHERE TO SIT...

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SELF-SERVICE TICKET MACHINE SELF-SERVING TRAIN OPERATOR

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PLEASE MIND THE GAP BETWEEN YOUR INCOME AND THE COST OF RAIL TRAVEL

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DON'T BOTHER ER, DEARIE. P'RAPS 'ER UNION AS CALLED A STAND-UP STRIKE

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